The Anatomy of a Selfie

2013 brought us the height of the "selfie," a self-shot photo of oneself in a specific place, doing something interesting, or just making a face. The ultimate online scream "LOOK AT ME." Selfie even placed among the most popular words of 2013 and also one of the most argued about. Yet if we look beneath the surface of this simple act of self-portraiture, lies a culture heading in the wrong direction.

The main focus of the selfie is ME. There is no doubt about that. I am the center, I am the subject, verb, adjective, adverb in this photographic sentence. All that remains around me is commentary. Look how well I am doing. Look how much fun I'm having (and you're not). Look how good I look. Even, look how stupid I look. But the main point is ME. If this were only an assignment for a single class in self-confidence, self-awareness or self-photography it might lie passively online consumed by friends and family and quickly forgotten. Yet I believe there is a stronger tie to where our culture is going and this is only a symptom of a larger sickness.

Western societies right now are in the grip of a weltanschauung (or world view) of ME. Walking through a bookstore yesterday (yes, there are a few left) I noted that the self-help section was prominently displayed and very extensive. Yet there is not a "world-help" or "community-help" section. We scream about individual rights and that is important, but what about the rights of the society? We walk down the street in our own selfie way expecting others to move or acknowledge us, yet there is not that same respect in return.

Small breakdowns begin to occur when ME is the focus. Why should I wait for a red light when I have to be somewhere? Why should I turn off my cell phone on the plane because I'm important and I might receive an important call (or even a not important call)? Why should I obey the law when it's not convenient for me?

A weltanschauung of ME means that society is present for my benefit and those within it are meant to assist me (translate this to "serve me") when I need them to. It means that I will not give up or weaken on anything I believe even for a greater good to the community (note our lack of congress). Laws become guidelines but mostly for others if I can skirt them and not get caught (the spike in drivers running red lights). And mostly life becomes a striving for my success even at the detriment of others (Enron and Madoff).

We live in a world where we have to move together, live together and survive together. Of course, history presents us with plenty of evidence of the danger of only focusing on the welfare of the community to the detriment of the individual. The key is a balance of focus on the interest of society and the interest of the individual. When we work toward balance everyone benefits, not just the few.

So the next time you want to take a selfie, ask someone to take it for you. Someone is always willing to take a few seconds and snap the shot. It only takes a moment to be vulnerable enough to ask for help. And you will have made a connection and possibly a friend.

China and US: Virtue is Found in The Middle

In Beijing our guide proudly escorted us through palaces and monuments of China's glorious past and around examples of their unlimited potential. She consistently spoke about how the government was moving to correct corruption and even referenced, though in veiled language, some of the challenges they face. Yet when speaking about the government, the country, or even herself she consistently used the pronoun "we." She embodied a "collective" mindset and provides a key learning point for all of us struggling to create a place where everyone can achieve their personal greatness.

We focus in this country on individuality. From the creation of the Constitution we emphasized the rights of the individual. This fosters an atmosphere where whatever is right for me is the most important thing. The state's responsibility is to protect my rights so that I can grow as an individual. This differentiation from others has it's place. It is part of the natural healthy psychological growth of any child. Yet have we taken it too far?

Current society offers us the iphone, ipad, moble me, (emphasis on "I" or "me"). We can eat individually by "having it my way," or with a "personal pan pizza." We are invited to create our own "personal home page" on many online sites and the news sites allow us to personalize the news we read. Mostly everything we read, eat, or do allows us to individualize in some form or another.

Yet the reality exists that we are a community. We have laws and societal standards which assist our growth, stability and functioning as a collective. This collective thinking is singularly important when developing the possibility of all people to discover and attain their personal greatness. What are we doing as a society to help all people move toward that goal? Are we willing to assist others, and occasionally compromise so that others can also succeed?

These are hard questions and they come with balance. In collective cultures, such as China, there is little place for the development of the individual outside what they can provide for the collective whole (though this is changing as I write this). What occurs is a society where almost everyone is working for the common good of all. What it doesn't foster is the development of the powers of each individual to be independently creative, critical and opportunistic. Conversely we have a society where we encourage individuality to the point that many people focus solely on their personal gain to the detriment of society.

Augustine of Hippo once stated "virtue is found in the middle." Developing individual strengths and personality is essential to the natural psychological growth of any individual and assists the whole society. But additionally it is necessary to have moments of compromise and agreement so that the society as a whole can thrive and foster each individual's personal greatness. Growth toward personal greatness cannot be found solely by focusing on "I" but by balancing our personal needs with the needs of the group and also focusing on "we." The balance is key and creates a place where everyone can grow and thrive.