Let's Start a Revolution

Reading the news this weekend was an exercise in frustration. Though statistically we are supposed to be living in the most peaceful epoch of humankind the examples of barbarism, extremism, isolationism and selfishness are rampant. Additionally there is an undercurrent that hope is dead, compromise is not even considered and working for the greater good is something we read about in history books. It would be easy in the face of all this depressing news to give up and give in to the monomaniacal mindset that since everything is so bad, it's every man and woman for him or her self. Screw everyone else, it's about me! Welcome to the world of 2013.

Enough of this crap. It's time to start a revolution. There are enough of us who hope, who work with others and who want to change the world for good. Perhaps the challenge is that we have not screamed louder than the chorus of nay-sayers, nor have we pushed them aside in our building of a great world. But what do we need to dispel the darkness that obscures possibilities? I read a quote over the weekend that placed things in perspective:

"Optimism is the greatest form of rebellion."

In the face of all the negative news optimists are laughed at, ridiculed and shunted aside. Yet the belief that there are new possibilities, new ideas, and new energy is a rebellion against the tide. Rather than succumb to the overwhelming negativity or at best, apathy, we want more. By thinking of options and possibilities they don't magically appear, but we are more likely to see and grasp them when they do appear; more importantly we are willing to work for change because we believe it can happen.
This will take personal committment on the part of many of us. But what will that cost? Last Friday I spoke to a room of professionals of the power of optimism, the success it brings and the change it ferments. The claim is that optimists don't see reality as it really is. Well that's BS. The difference is that we see reality as it really is but don't allow it to win. We believe we can change reality for the good. Yet to many people optimists are obnoxious. So I asked the audience to become "obnoxious optimists." That may be the only way the world will hear another voice, another way and a powerful energy toward positive change. 

Why Are Optimists so Obnoxious?

Okay, I'm an admitted optimist. Yep, born that way. I'm guessing my genetic predisposition toward optimism  is well over the 50% that researchers say is present in society. On top of that I choose to be optimistic the other 40% of the time and the 10% of my life circumstances aren't too bad. So why it is so difficult to be around me? After all, I'm the cheery guy who always sees the bright side of things. Therein lies the problem.

"I'd like to slap you upside the head" said an HR Director yesterday when she heard from Jan, my business partner, how optimistic I am. "Yep" agreed Jan, "sometimes it's obnoxious." I took all of this in the fun in which it was meant,  but it caused me to think. With all of this happiness and positiveness being promoted by books, speakers and workshops is it making some of us tough to live with?

What is it about optimists that make us so difficult to be around? Well, I'd like to offer my side as an optimist, but I'm open to hearing from others. The researchers say that the difference between optimism and pessimism is about "explanatory style." That means when something bad or good happens to us we "explain" it by telling ourselves how it will affect us. Is the negative event permanent and pervasive, or just temporary and local? Our explanation then drives our behavior. So, it's not about whether the glass is half full or half empty, it's about what you are thinking after you dump it in your lap. Does it ruin your entire day, or is it a momentary accident?

My theory about why optimists are considered obnoxious rests on what optimism or pessimism allows us to do. Pessimism, because it leans toward the believe that bad things will continue to happen, or something will go wrong, allows us to wallow in the difficulty of the moment. We comfort ourselves that we've done our best and can savor all of the pity of our friends and family. We can rest for the moment because, after all, nothing else can be done. Optimists on the other hand, seeing the challenge as temporary, realize there is  more that can be done, perhaps another avenue of departure, and we move forward. There is no resting, no wallowing in the moment, but just charging ahead seeing another opportunity.

No wonder we're considered so obnoxious. Sometimes it feels good to have people comfort you, give advice, or just feel sorry for you and you don't have to do anything. We optimists rain on that parade big time! The worst part is that we usually foist our optimistic advice just when the other person is enjoying the attention, or the rest.

So, I think I'll try letting others enjoy their moment of attention, or wallowing. If they want my advice they will ask for it. As for me, I'll be on the sunny side of the street.